There Are Two Types of Poopers—Which One Are You?

Everybody poops—no shocker there. However, some of us have strong preferences and quirky habits regarding when or where we do our business.

A recent bathroom emergency of my own sparked a fun debate among friends on this very topic. As we wandered the city, desperately searching for a public restroom, we started discussing our, uh, toilet tendencies. Somewhere along the way, we developed a theory: There are two types of poopers in this world.

First, you’ve got the ones who go at the same time every day like clockwork—let’s call them time-based or “temporal poopers.” Whether the urge strikes, say, first thing in the morning, after dinner, or both, that’s your only window. Then, there are “locational poopers.” What matters more than when they do their business is where—and for understandable reasons, it’s probably at home. Anywhere else—a communal office bathroom, your friend’s pristine apartment, a teeny restaurant stall—is a no-go.

I was curious if this theory held any weight, which is why I posed the question to the experts. Turns out, pooping is way more personal than we often realize, Benjamin Levy, MD, a gastroenterologist and clinical associate of medicine at the University of Chicago, tells SELF. After reading this, for instance, maybe you instantly know which one you are (I’m a temporal pooper, through and through). It’s also common to relate to both—like, you can only go at home and more specifically, after your morning coffee. Or maybe time and place are irrelevant, and you’re blessed (cursed?) with pure, chaotic flexibility. It doesn’t matter that it’s 4 p.m. and you’re at a grocery store—you’ve gotta find the nearest toilet, now.

While these tendencies can definitely fluctuate (depending on factors like your diet, stress levels, and hydration), there are fascinating reasons why lots of us fall into regular patterns. And if my friends’ spirited 30-minute debate taught me anything, it’s that people feel very strongly about which kind of pooper they are.

So, what’s a temporal pooper?

You’re not one of those people who can just go whenever. You’ve got a set poop window (or windows)—maybe as soon as you wake up and/or right after your lunch break. Either way, your body’s got a reliable schedule, and duty rarely (if ever) calls outside of that frame.

For what it’s worth, you don’t have to be a strictly temporal pooper to have a somewhat reliable schedule—science suggests our digestive systems often prefer certain times more than others, Kyle Staller, MD, MPH, gastroenterologist and director of the Gastrointestinal Motility Laboratory at Mass General Hospital, tells SELF. For instance, it’s super common to go first thing in the morning because “while we’re sleeping, the colon in general is quiet,” Dr. Staller says. “And when we wake up, it starts to contract,” triggering a natural, involuntary response called the gastrocolic reflex that pushes yesterday’s food remnants closer to your butt. Eating a meal also kickstarts this reflex, which is why many people experience that “gotta-go” sensation specifically after breakfast, lunch, or dinner.