For many of us, browsing through our favorite online stores isn’t just about shopping—it’s a mindless, relaxing act of self-care. (We call it retail therapy for a reason.)
When you shop, your brain’s reward center is activated, which triggers the release of the feel-good neurotransmitter dopamine, Kate Cummins, PsyD, a licensed clinical psychologist and speaker in the Bay Area, tells SELF. That explains how jumping from page to page can be strangely exciting. So why, then, does it sometimes leave you with an icky mix of guilt, regret, and hollow emptiness instead? We asked psychologists to break down the most common reasons your online shopping habit is leaving you drained (and not just financially)—plus, how to browse in a way that’s actually enjoyable.
1. The paradox of choice is overwhelming.
On the web, there are near infinite brands, retailers, and products to comb through. Not only are you drowning in pages of items, but you’re also inundated with tons of information—sales and promotions, customer reviews, details on materials, size charts, etc. All this, yet you still can’t see, feel, or try anything on.
“Research shows that we have a paradox of choice,” Diedre Popovich, PhD, an associate professor of marketing in the Rawls College of Business at Texas Tech University, tells SELF. “Consumers love to have a lot of different options available to us, but when we have too many, we actually end up in decision paralysis”—or the inability to pick due to overwhelming choices.
On top of that, many brands aren’t just selling products—they’re selling you a whole new lifestyle. It’s about “the idea that if you have this product, your life will be infinitely better,” Dr. Popovich says. Will a $15 organizer from Amazon finally make you a neat freak? Can those trendy jeans help you love your body, once and for all? It’s not that simple—and more often than not, you’ll end up with more stress, anxiety, and indecisiveness than you had when you started.
2. It can be a total time-suck.
In theory, buying stuff online should be more efficient: There’s no need to leave the house, try things on, or go from store to store searching for what you want. But even digital window shopping can quickly turn into a bigger time investment than you imagined.
This could be attributed to “flow,” the psychological state often described as being “in the zone,” according to Dr. Popovich. Time seems to fly by when you’re immersed in a task at hand, whether you’re playing video games or browsing mindlessly online. When you’re in flow, before you know it, a good chunk of your day is gone—which is great when you’re doing something that’s been long on your to-do list or finishing up a work project, but can be all the more frustrating if, after all that scrolling, you have no purchases to show for the hours spent.
3. There’s mounting pressure to be a “responsible” consumer.
The cultural context around shopping is changing, which can make the experience even more stressful. Sustainability, in particular, is becoming increasingly important to customers as we learn more about the massive waste associated with high-buy lifestyles; it’s spurred social media trends like “underconsumption core” and the rise of ThriftTok.
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